A Schizoid at Smith: How Overparenting Leads to Underachievingby Blair Sorrel is an fascinating, unconventional memoir that challenges not only the structure of the genre but also societal assumptions about achievement, identity, and mental health. Set against the tumultuous backdrop of the 1960s and 1970s, Sorrel’s account is a psychological case study and a soul-searching journey through the isolating effects of Schizoid Personality Disorder (SPD), a condition that’s rarely discussed, especially from a first-person perspective.
From the opening line—“I guess you wonder how you got to where you are?”—the memoir signals its reflective and interrogative nature. This question, posed by Sorrell’s clinician in 1988, serves as the launching point for the author’s attempt to make sense of her past: a childhood shadowed by cold, emotionally distant parenting; an adolescence marked by disconnection; and a college experience at Smith, where the pressures of elite academia only deepened her sense of alienation.
SPD, which is characterized by emotional detachment, a lack of interest in social relationships, and an aversion to intimacy, has a constant presence in Sorrel’s narrative. Rather than providing a tidy, chronological recounting of events, Sorrel mirrors the inner experience of SPD through often free-flowing prose and sudden shifts in thought and focus. This fragmented structure, while it can get jarring and even confusing, is a compelling, intentional echo of the schizoid condition. Sorrel’s emotionally neutral tone, even in moments of personal trauma or triumph, conveys the strange sense of distance she feels from her world — a bit like field notes on a life rather than a deep recounting of one’s own emotional catharsis.
Another central theme in the book is the damaging legacy of overparenting. Sorrel isn’t shy when it comes to her critique of her parents, or the status-driven, emotionally negligent upbringing she received. Her parents are portrayed not as villains, but as complex figures whose own unresolved trauma influenced their rigid parenting — but the cost of that baggage is clear. Their high expectations, combined with a lack of emotional support, sowed the seeds for Sorrel’s lifelong struggles with confidence, connection and self-worth. Her story suggests that overparenting can stunt emotional growth and create an internal world where underachievement becomes not a failure, but a symptom. Overwhelmed by expectations, there’s no way to not underperform.
Landing at Smith College in the 1970s, as told by Sorrel, is an unsettling, though at times hilarious, disaster. Here, amidst a progressive and intellectually rigorous environment, she finds herself stuck on the margins, unable to make her way into the school’s intellectual or social world. She witnesses but doesn’t participate. She watches others build relationships, explore identities, and embrace freedoms, but remains trapped behind a kind of psychic wall. She’s followed by the “Angel of Asexuality” as she calls it, unable to navigate romantic and sexual expectations. We feel her conflict, her detachment, her frustration, and the dissonance of being unable to conform to the definition of conventional success.
But there’s joy in this book — in Sorrel’s wild prose, in her sly humor, in her intense connection to the pop culture of her times. She loves music, especially, with more than an average fan’s adoration: in many ways, rock truly does sooth her soul. Within the drama of a well-crafted pop song she finds her own emotional compass, and can feel freely, note by note, lyric by lyric. She lives within music; she thrives in it; she knows it.
A Schizoid at Smith is a memoir that insists on its own sensibility, its own language, its own perspective, and its own truth — just as its author has had to shape her own life and define success on her own terms. This is a courageous story that isn’t just superficially vulnerable, it’s deeply so. It presents a point of view and a reality to the reader that comes with a great deal of charm as well, as the best memoirs can.
Garth Thomas